20.11.08

Why I Love Spam E-mail

So I'm pretty sure we all get spam e-mail from time to time, and I don't know about you but I have a love-hate relationship with it. Most of the time, it's just some stupid robot trying to sell you something or sometimes it's not even in English! Most of the time it's just annoying to sift through the crap to get to the good e-mails. However, once in awhile a good one actually comes along. Take for instance the spam e-mail I got today. It was just too weird and too funny to delete and never speak of again! Allow me to demonstrate: 

Knock!!! knock!!!! (Um... this is an e-mail you're not at my door why are you knocking?!) May i come into ur world ??? (Come into my word?!!? I don't even know you!) I bring no flower, no cake , no chocalote, but i wishes u (wow great grammar) flesh prayer to keep ur healthy & luv to keep u smiling... (Um.. what?!?!) May u begin the day with a smile on ur face &with happiness from ur soul to embrace. Am Mark Ken(Again with the grammar...) with a simple life..everything is good and i'm enjoying my life as it is.. (I'm so happy for you... since I don't even know you!) i'm hoping to achieve something in the future, (aren't we all!?) aiming for the stars...still struggling with my business (owh i should not put struggling but i'm enjoying it the way i suppose to)... (wow what was that side note? Didn't quite catch that..)really wish to meet with that special someone one fine day and i always praying for that...i loves the way i am today but the most important thing is i'm missing to ask as my friend so much especially my parents, i lost them in a airport crash...hard to believes that they are so far away from me..really wish to see them and also my bestess friends back at home..miss you priness (what is he calling me princess?? Creepy...) please come ro (do what now?) my and be my queen so that we can have a lot Fun-loving, style-conscious, creative and genuine, (was that a sentence?) you all know who you are..huhuhu---> (what did he just say??!?! huhuhhu???) 
I didn't add too many comments to that one because I think it speaks for itself... 
Then there's this one... apparently it's ok to request money from people you don't even know: 
Good day,i am requesting for your kind ASSISTANCE AND HELP,(what's with the random caps?!?i want to go into a lucrative business (is there any other kind of business that one would want?!?! Who wants a non-lucrative business?!),i need some money PLEASE NOTHING IS TOO SMALL (really!? Nothing is too small... so I can send you a penny?!?! That's my kind of donation!) ,GOD BLESS YOU.YOUR KIND REPLY WILL BE APPRECIATED.THANKS,kelvinanderson@aol.es,Regards,Kelvin
Or, how about this "anonymous visitor" who feels the need to tell me I have bad posture: 
Dear Patrice, 

An anonymous visitor stopped by NiceCritic.com and selected the following message for you:

Better posture might convey more confidence. NiceCritic.com

If you wish to unsubscribe, just click here

You can be sure I clicked that unsubscribe button!! 

So next time you get spam e-mail, consider reading it because you never know what you'll find! 

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9 comments:

Dawn said...

That first one is hilarious, and the last one is quite rude...and yet funny. I rarely open up spam email, but maybe I should start.

Random Hiccups said...

That first one is so hilarious!

It left me at a loss because 1. what has become of society and their communication?

It left me at a loss because 2. WTF?

and it left me at a loss because 3. I was so out of breath from laughing so ridiculously hard...

Thanks for sharing! *breathe breathe*

Jen E @ mommablogsalot said...

that is too funny and too strange!

Chelle said...

Lol! Those are hilarious!

I love your commentary, too! Lmao!

sues2u2 said...

Who knew something so bad could be so humorous?

Janah said...

I got that first email also. I was like who in the hell?! I should have been more excited since I don't get many emails. But considering I'm married, this was one email I wanted to delete real quick!

Heidi said...

Creepy!!! That's all I have to say. I just won the lotto in Sweden. I didn't even know I entered, but there it was in black & white on my email so it must be true. Right?

Tasha Via said...

That is SO funny! I absolutely HATE spam e-mail. I am going to start reading some of them before they go to my trash though. It may really give me a good laugh...

Rebecca Kelsey said...

I have one of those filters that puts all my spam into one folder so I almost never read them. Most of the time they talk about how I am being looked up on Reunion.com. I find that damn hard to believe since I just graduated. Who uses Reunion.com anyway when there are social networking sites?!

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