Things that don't help when going through a break up

I promise my blog is not being taken over by me feeling sorry for myself over the whole break up thing... however in my defense it has only been a week, and it's my blog I should be able to write whats on my mind, and whether I like it or not, this is on my mind. Anyway, lately I've been getting a lot of advice and sympathy going through this whole thing. Some people are really helpful, and my friends are an amazing support system. I'm lucky to be in a house full of people who really care. However, sometimes when people think they are helping they just aren't. Here's some of the not-so-helpful-but-trying-to-be comments that I've gotten lately:

• There are plenty of fish in the sea- While this may be true, yes. 1. It's a small school & a small town, so I kind of feel like my options are limited, and 2. That's not really what I want to here right now.
• You can do so much better- again, this may be true, but again, not what I want to hear right now. It honestly just pisses me off coming from friends because when we were together, we were "so cute" and he's "such a good guy" and now all the sudden he's not good enough? I can understand if he was a jerk about the break up, but as I said, he wasn't.
• You can't keep doing this to yourself, stop thinking about it all- I got this as I was crying... like it was my fault I was upset, like I want to feel like total crap! Like I want to obsessively think about everything, to the point where it does make me want to cry? No, but I really can't help it. Like I said it's still so new, and it still hurts, so sometimes I cry... it's all part of the process.
• Just give it time, time heals everything- I know this can actually be really good advice, but again, not so much what I want to hear. I don't want to give it time! I just want to fast forward through the "time" and get to a point where its not awkward for us to be friends.
• Do you really think you can be friends, that never works- um yes. I do. and thanks for the voted confidence... real nice!
• He's a jerk- this kind of goes a long with the whole you can do better thing... 1st of all he had the opportunity to be a jerk about it and he wasn't, and 2nd he really isn't a jerk, and he definitely wasn't a jerk when we were together, so the fact that we broke up doesn't make him a jerk because he broke up because he cares.

I know people mean well, and I know from experience its hard to know what to say to someone going through a break up. I just had to vent a little. Also, on the subject of advice... one of my guy friends just started a blog!!! I'm so excited, it's going to be like an advice blog, so if you want to ask him any questions, e-mail him at bryansadvice at gmail dot com, and check it out his blog (maybe give it a little while so he can get a post up!)

Not Me Monday!

This is my 1st time participating in MckMama's Not Me Monday! I'm so excited! If you haven't checked out her blog, you definitely need to.. she has an amazing story and 4 amazingly cute kiddo's! So anyway here are some of the things I did not do lately: I did not spend almost the entire day in bed on Monday after the unfortunate event, and I did not skip my classes so I could sulk and feel sorry for myself. Not me, that would be stupid! I also did not let my friends talk me into going out with them that night... to his fraternity house. I also did not have to excuse myself to go to the bathroom and cry once I got there and someone informed me they didn't know where my boyfriend was, and I had to inform them he was no longer my boyfriend... not me. I also did not let my same friend talk me into going over there again the next day... where I did not have an awkward run-in with him. Nope. I did not start talking to this guy again this weekend... not me, that would be a bad idea. I also did not tell him to leave me alone only 2 days after we started talking because he was creeping me out hardcore. (There will not be more on this later, since this did not happen) I did not pay $30 at the airport this weekend for a book and a magazine... that's crazy! I did not eat like there was no tomorrow all weekend, not just Thanksgiving... I would never do that! I did not spend Friday night with friends drinking at my house... I would never do that in my house! I also did not steal borrow a few alcoholic drinks from my parents, not me! I did not break down and cry tonight when I got back to my room because of the incident... not me, I'm over it already. I did not sign up for NaBloPoMo and then ditch it 2 days later... not me! I did not stay up until 4 in the morning tonight enjoying the reunion with my friends and then writing this post even though I have class at 9 AM... that would just be stupid! So, hope you enjoyed reading about what I haven't been up to... sorry for the lack of posts this week, I'll update you guys soon on what's been going on.

Sad Day

Just in time for the holiday season, sad news :( My boyfriend and I broke up last night... he broke up with me. He was nice about it, and he didn't want to have to end things... but he has a lot going on and needs to get his life together before he can be in a relationship. I understand, I do, but it hurts... a lot. I wish there was a way that he could get his life together and still keep me in his life as his girlfriend, but it doesn't look like there is a way for that to work right now. I am so lucky to be surrounded by amazing friends, who all took care of me last night. I know this is the best thing right now, and I'm really glad that he cares about me enough not to drag me on when he doesn't feel like he can be 100% committed to this relationship. He has a lot going on in his life, and he felt like our relationship was possibly just another way for him to escape. I know he needs to get his life together, and we both said that it's possible there is a future, but for now he has to figure some stuff out. I just can't stop blaming myself... I know it's not my fault, it's no one's fault really, but I feel like there is more I could've done, I should've been there for him more... there are just so many regrets. If there is such a thing as a good time to break up, I guess that now is a good time because I'm leaving tomorrow to go home for thanksgiving, so we'll get a break from each other and we'll be able to think about things. It sucks. There's really no other way to say it. It really sucks. I miss him. I wish it didn't have to be like this. The worst part is, I had no idea. I did not see this coming at all, and that sucks even more. I know I'll be okay, and eventually when I'm ready I'll be his friend because he needs friends in his life right now, and maybe someday, when the timing is right, we can be together. Who knows what the future holds... all I know is I need to stop focusing on the past, and focus on the positive things. It's just gonna be a really hard couple of days...