Umm.. what ?!?!

So I may have mentioned a couple of times that I have been waiting... and waiting for some funny keywords that people use to get to my blog to show up on Google Analytics so I can write a post like all the great ones I've read from everyone else. (is it me or was that a major run on sentence? O well) Well, friends, family, aliens, others: the day has finally come! I have become a bit obsessed with my keywords, and so I had some spare time and decided to see what people have been searching to get to my blog these days. Here are the winners:

1. 60 something woman's blog- dear Google person, I sincerely hope when you say 60 something woman, you are NOT meaning 60 something in age. Perhaps you were looking for 60 or something different woman's blogs? I don't know, but I am nowhere near 60.
2. Google.com- Um.... who Google's google? And even if you're not using google but yahoo or msn or some other search engine... why on earth would you feel the need to search for google.com?? Also, you spent a long time on my blog after searching for google.com: 3 minutes! I'm curious, google googler (how do you like that?!) what on my blog intrigued you about google.com? Perhaps my love of google reader? or google analytics? Well I hope you found what you were looking for, but I'm guessing not.
3. English paper about a terrible day- Um... why would you write an English paper about a terrible day? I certainly haven't. That is what this blog is for. And yes I have certainly blogged about having a terrible day. But I don't think I've blogged about English papers? Although I did write an English paper about blogging. Not kidding!
4. One month of menus for a sorority house- yes, it is true I live in the sorority house. Alpha Chi Omega to be exact. However, I can not tell you anything about the menus for a sorority house. We eat at the cafeteria like everyone else. If it convinces you to go Greek I'll make something up: Monday- Filet Mignon Tues- Lobster Weds- Spaghetti. Ok, convinced? Good. Rush Alpha Chi Omega!
5. People writing- What exactly were you trying to get to by googling people writing? Yes, I write, especially on my blog. Do you have a blog, googler? You should. It's all the rage. And people write on them. It's like a big giant community of people writing! Yes, people writing, which apparently you're interested in, so go for it!
6. What to say to a girl not loving- Well, I am no expert, but I would say "Why are you not loving?" What not funny? I know. Let me try again... perhaps singing to her "Can you feel the love tonight?" yeah, I've got nothing.

Now for my favorites:

• "movie quote i'll give you three meals a day and you can sleep with me if you want to."- I'm sorry, what??! What kind of movie are you watching? It's true I did a post on movie quotes, but I don't recall offering to sleep with you... not to mention how do you even put those 2 together.. I'll feed you 3 meals a day- good, proper nutrition always important. You can sleep with me... woah! I'm sorry you can't sleep with me. I am not a pimp!
• The 4th hole on women- I don't even want to think about what this could mean. Please tell me you mean hole as in a piercing on your ear. I hope it's not something perverted. This sounds like some kind of sick game... like hey, see if you can find the 4th hole on women! Ya, we don't have holes. Ok well we have 1... oh my gosh off topic, moving on!

So, I hope you enjoyed. I guess I wouldn't necessarily call them funny, but they were at least somewhat entertaining right? Maybe it's just me being overly optimistic that people are actually searching something other than Not a Girl, Not yet a Woman to get my blog! Also, I'm not sure whether or not I am creeped out by the fact that several people specifically googled "Patrice William Woods Fulton" or some variation of that with my name, etc to get to my blog. I sincerely hope it's friends and family who are looking for my blog and not creepers...